Meeting (and Keeping) Quality People in Your Life

By now, most people fundamentally understand the value of being surrounded by quality people. In fact, many people have it as a resolution for the year.

You’ve heard quotes like:
“Show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are” OR “You are an average of your 5 closest friends”

But HOW do you do meet (and keep) these quality people in your life?
You already have a bunch of friends but you want to start taking this up a notch to increase your network?

Here are a few practical tips that won’t cost you more than a change in perspective and a small dose of guts

1) Don’t be fascinated only by people who are accomplished:
Once this clicks, you realize that there are more people accessible to you than you thought. Quality people are everywhere.
Typically, when we want to improve our circle or better our network, we have this impression that we should look for people who have made it or done it or succeeded at “it” (whatever “it” is). However, there is great value in meeting and knowing people in the thick of their journey towards their dreams. This is for several reasons

1a) People are more appreciative of your interest in them while they are still on their way. They value that relationship much better because it makes them feel validated even though they haven’t “made it” yet.

1b) At this stage, you still have the opportunity to serve them and offer actual value to them. Your advice can still make a difference for them.

2) Serve with your intelligence:

If I were to ask you how intelligent you are, you’d probably say you were pretty intelligent”.
Question is: Does that intelligence serve the people you meet?

Like… if you were an event planner and you met someone at a party who introduces him/herself as a finance blogger at a party, where do you go from there? “Oh cool…that’s nice”? or “Oh cool. Have you ever thought about holding conferences? You know, financial conferences are usually very profitable. If you ever need advice on putting a financial seminar together I can help give you some ideas and recommend some good locations.”

In other words, you may not know much about blogging or finance, but you do know about events.

Some might just say “well isn’t this just networking?” No. Not in the way most people understand networking.

Here is the difference:

Most people think that networking is about collecting or exchanging contact information. Networking is more than that. Networking is about finding and connecting with people who you can add value to, who may or may not get an opportunity to add value back to you

3) Learn to have interesting and meaningful conversations:

This is super important.

When people meet you, there is a higher chance they will want to stay connected with you if they enjoyed their conversation with you.

This has nothing to do with your degrees, job title, or anything external thing. This is the YOU factor here.
If people think you want to stay connected with them just because of their your title, money, looks, and things like that, they already know you are in it for the wrong reasons.

However, when you are great at meaningful conversations and are interesting to talk to, they invite you into their world.

4) Work on understanding and articulating your purpose:

It’s very simple:

People with purpose are attracted to people with purpose.

That doesn’t mean you have to have your life and destiny figured out. But at least be able to articulate what you have figured out so far or what you are working on figuring out.

People who are going somewhere want to know other people who are going somewhere.

5) Be a connector:

You might not be able directly add value or solve everyone’s problems, but you may know people. And you’ll be surprised by the power of your network. Always be on the lookout for how you can connect quality people together and they will forever be connected and (indebted) to you.

6) Be a brain picker:

People enjoy being a source of help to others especially in areas that relate to their own passion.

Now, this does not entail taking advantage of people and asking for impossible favors that don’t help you grow.

You want to reach out to people and say things like:

“I see that you’ve done X or you do Y really well and its an area that I want to improve in. Would you be so kind as to spare no more than 40 min to help me gain some perspective on my project/event/whatever over coffee? Specifically, I think that your knowledge of nuclear fusion will help me understand my thesis paper on accounting”

(whatever…you get the point)

7) Work the ones you already have:

I’ll be honest.

For most of us, it’s not that we need to attract new people into our lives, its that we need to learn to better manage, nurture and grow the relationships we already have.

Make connections! Reach out!. Don’t just visit their Instagram page to see what is going on in their lives, actually meet up with them and let them tell you or at least give them a call.

8) Pick up a new hobby:

Sounds crazy? Don’t let it. If you think about it, you’ll realize that many times, similar people share hobbies. That’s why you bond very quickly with people who also like your bobbies. However, if you want to meet new people who are not like you and expand your network, pick up a new hobby (even if you know nothing about that hobby or are just taking lessons) and it will blow your mind how quickly you can increase the quality of your network.

Alright then! Go out there, meet great people, and make the best of this year!

So which one will you probably start with and which one might be the most challenging for you? (Comment Below)